My bipolar diagnosis came as a shock, but has helped me to clearly make sense of my behavior throughout my lifetime. I am not within the normal age range for bipolar diagnosis…it was not until I was 34 that this bomb was dropped on me.
It was not until August 2013 when I was diagnosed. Over the past year my reckless behavior while in a hypomanic state nearly destroyed my marriage. This prompted me to begin meeting with a therapist who suggested that I talk with a psychiatrist. When all the pieces were put together it was determined that I am in fact bipolar disorder II. Let be restate that…the diagnosis is not me, but rather explains my behavior and a new challenge that I must manage.
I have done my best to embrace the diagnosis and turn it into a positive. I began writing a daily blog where I could share my experiences and thoughts as I come to complete terms with my new reality. While I do not know what will happen with my marriage and family relationships, I am using the diagnosis to help me become a better person…a more stable person.
There has not been a day where I have missed taking my medication. Despite the side effects I know that it is in my best interest. There are times when I miss the euphoric feeling of being in a manic state. This weighs on me at times, but I know that I can get through it.
Most importantly, I am not hiding my diagnosis. I am sharing and using the opportunity to educate those who I come into contact with. It has amazed me the number of people that I know who have dealt with similar issues and have not been diagnosed. I am not advocated that we all live in the “Prozac Nation” but I only hope for those who need help to realize they cannot do it alone.
Thank you to all of those who support those who have mental illness.