I wake up on morning realizing that my mental health problems didn’t stop with depression… 3 years after being diagnosed the voices decided to rear their ugly heads. I was now in a tailspin of confusion and a million questions. Why me? What is this? Will I ever overcome this?
Now words are being thrown at me like schizophrenic and delusional. I wasn’t allowed to go to school or drive or be left alone. “You’re worthless, no one believes you, we’re never leaving, you’re crazy, you can never get better.” My brain was overtaken.
But there is hope, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. my family and friends got me through it. With everyone there is always so much more to the story, I could tell you the hell I went through, the amount of times I hit rock bottom and the times I tried to end it all, but I’m still here and a better person because I survived.
Today, 5 years later, (and 9 years after my depression began) I live my life the way it was meant to be, free of hallucinations. I get up every day and do not hide. I am a young (23) female living with schizophrenia and if you ask me I will tell you and I will try and teach you that the stigma around this disease is wrong.
I am not ashamed of what is ‘wrong’ with me; I embrace it and hope that someday people look at individuals with mental illness as people, just plain old people. My journey through hell and back taught me to live every day to its fullest. My acceptance didn’t happen overnight, it took years and with the help and support or family and doctors and lots of therapy. Don’t get me wrong, I still struggle. This is a lifelong incurable illness, but it doesn’t have to control you.