NAMI - You are Not Alone — My name is Himanshu Sharma and my age is 25 years....

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My name is Himanshu Sharma and my age is 25 years. Since childhood at age of 10, I am suffering from a mental illness called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). 

Due to this mental disability I wasn’t able to control my thoughts and action. It’s hard to concentrate on any kind of work whether it’s about study or any other mental or physical work like playing, worship, and many more. Because of OCD my childhood was horrible. My friends and teachers laughed at me on my silly behavior like I used to toughed object twice , thrice , four time and sometimes it’s more than 20 times. This is only one example of OCD there are a lot of rituals I have to do for overcome my OCD anxiety. Sir this OCD has ruined my academic life. When I was in 8th standard I score 82% in board examination but after it my educational graph is continuously decreases. It is like a curse of my childhood. I thought it’s a part of me and I have to live with this curse.

But when I was in final year of my college I read an article in news paper written by a psychologist filled by same kind of problem that I have. Then I understand it’s a psychological problem. I searched on internet for a psychologist in my city and contacted him. The psychologist diagnosed that I have a psychological problem called “Obsessive Compulsive Disorder”. At that time I have good news and bad news both. Good news was, now I knew from what I am suffering from and bad news was this disorder is incurable. The only way to treat this I have to take medication for uncertain number of years. The doctor prescribed me medication.

I started taking this medicine continuously and after couple of month I found there are some remarkable changes  in my behavior now the amount of disturbing thoughts are lesser then before and my anxiety was less intensive. The effect of medicine was slow, it took months to effect but it was working. On the other hand I kept researching on OCD on the internet. The internet helped me so much, I found that am not the only one with this curse there are many persons like me. I was happy am not alone but sad because it had ruined my carrier.

Now I have completed B.tech in Electronics and Communication. I don’t have words to explain how difficult it was to do study with a mental disorder like OCD. Every time I had to fight with my anxiety. It was really impossible for me to give my 100% concentration in classroom and study. But after uncountable interaction with my anxiety and disturbing thoughts I completed my graduation in engineering.

After 5 years of continuous medication I am glad to say I can control my 55% of OCD. It is still in my mind but now I can concentrate on work sometimes it’s difficult but I am happy I can able to do this. But when I looked back to my past I found that OCD has ruined my childhood and carrier. Due to my poor academic performance no company is hiring me and am not eligible for government exams because of my graduation percentages, in short my carrier has spoiled.

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