June 3, 2014

Thank you for your interest in my recovery story. I have been in mental health treatment for the past thirty-three years. It began at age eight when I was sexually molested by a close relative. I did not tell anyone out of shame and guilt for ten years. I became anorexic immediately following the assault, which turned into bulimia, severe depression and anxiety through my teenage years. My parents would not allow hospitalization or medication because of their ignorance and the stigma involved. Suicide was constantly on my mind. My parents did allow for weekly psychotherapy treatments.

At seventeen, I suffered a major mental breakdown and was limited in my high school attendance. I disclosed facts about the abuse during therapy, but no charges were filed, once again due to the perceived stigma. At eighteen, I took myself to the psychiatrist and received my first prescription for an anti-depressant. Lack of effectiveness and side effects caused me to spend the next fifteen years trying different medicine combinations.

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My father was a drug addict, paranoid schizophrenic, dealer and hoarder.

Growing up was traumatic to say the least, I ended up moving out at age 15.

Currently I am 28, a father to be, high school teacher and martial arts instructor.

My whole life I have been dealing with depression, anxiety and other mental health concerns.

I found that the best therapy came from writing my story, first in the form of poetry then in a book. Even if you only write for your self, please do it. It will help!

Sometimes the trauma we experience is not definable in terms of scientific research or assessments. Sometimes depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues are never actually diagnosed but somehow those of us who experience these issues deal with them on a daily basis and find inspiration and hope in our communities and inside ourselves.  

I, like many others, have experienced multiple traumas in my life including rape, abandonment, intimate partner violence, a diagnosis of a “terminal” disease, homelessness, and drug addiction.  Yet, somehow, I have made it through these experiences and found help along the way.  Not from the system of care (as many of us know, the system of care is not really designed to “care”), I found help in the support and love from others who have also experienced similar things.  It is their courage and compassion that gave me the strength to keep moving forward.  It is their determination and insight that helped me work through the pain and fear.  

I am forever grateful for those who guided me along the way.  Your support will never be forgotten.  Your support helped me to not only find a new way to live but to follow my passion and help others.  Even though I have been dragged through the mud, I know my worth and value has not changed.  Today, I am working on a PhD. and hope that the work I do, the community bridges from research and academia to the real world I build, can help inspire others.  May you find love and peace in your hearts

Hi my name is Sarah h Baggett. I’ve had mental health issues in since I was 17. I have severe depression, severe anxiety, and Ptsd. I also suffer with paranoid thoughts with the severe depression. I take medication for these mental health issues. And the medication has helped me SO much. I’m thankful that there is medicine I can take for the depression and the other mental health issues. I am a human being. I’m not defined by my mental health issues. I do not call myself crazy. I call myself Sarah. I’m thankful I had the chance to get help with my mental health. Before my time in this world is  done. NAMI was there in my life before when I needed them. Thank you Nami. I feel a deep hopefulness and love.

My journey with mental health has not been an easy one. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression in 2011. I was constantly having panic attacks at bight time which prevented me from sleeping. I finally decided that it was time to get the help I very much so needed. I did, and every since then I can better manage my mental health with the tools that my therapist has given me. There is light and hope even after the darkest of storms. Keep fighting ❤️

Hello,

My name is Jonathan Kohlmeier and I am a 19 year old college student and an aspiring author. I am trying to submit for the “You Are Not Alone” series. Ever since I was little I’ve suffered from anxiety and depression and I think we as a society have a long way to go on mental health. The public needs to hear more stories about mental health to start to de-stigmatize these issues in society. I have recently completed a memoir about my story. It is not yet published but I’m in the process of trying to get the book published. I have titled it “Learning to Play the Game,” the same as this article. I feel as though my struggles could be comparable to a game that I’ve learned to play with myself. The stigma around mental health is real and I think we as a society need to give it the attention it requires.

Thank you for your consideration,

Jonathan Kohlmeier

Imagine that every conversation of your life was like getting up on stage, naked, at the Met, in front of 3,000 people.

It is a feeling I get when I feel like I can’t do something. Something bigger than me is standing in the way. It feels almost literal, like walls are built up brick by brick. Some people might be deathly afraid of spiders or snakes or heights. I’m deathly afraid of other people. Just think of your worst fear and having to live with it all the time. Forever. The threshold of when I begin to feel it has changed as I got older, but it’s the same feeling. I feel as though I’m constantly being watched. The problem is that I’ve come to like being with other people too. That’d be like being afraid of spiders but having a tarantula as a pet, by choice. I know this must seem confusing but I’ve lived with it for 19 years and even I don’t understand it.

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I refuse to stay silent about mental health and how it affects me.  I was paralyzed by the stigma all of my life I started speaking out and talking my depression/anxiety openly online. Through my writing I have been able to reach so many people. I remember when I first started sharing, I heard “You are not alone” and it was such a powerful statement because I had felt so alone all my life, I felt ostracized and made to feel that my mental illness made me inferior to others. “You are not alone” soon became my motto.  When I share my struggles and my story, not only do I get the support and love I need but someone else is helped as well by reading my words, it’s a powerful feeling to go from feeling stigmatized, mocked, alone and helpless to finally being a voice for others and getting support back as a result, it’s a responsibility that I don’t take lightly.

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Anxiety and depression is real. I am one of them. Don’t be afraid to seek help. A lot of people go years without seeking professional help. I was one of them. At the age of 37 I was hospitalized for a week I was officially diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Losing my children in the midst isn’t making it easier. Please seek out a local psyc hospital or mental health professional. I hope me coming out publicly will encourage others to do the same.

My name is Mike Logan Stubbs. I’m a 28-year-old from England. I suffer from depression and mental health issues which I believe have haunted me for nearly six years now.

My depression got so bad four months ago, I attempted to take my own life and was hospitalized.

I felt like no matter what I did, I would always feel this way (depressed). I can get so low, like the flick of a switch, when my depression is at its worst and unfortunately cannot control it.

When I got out of hospital, with the support of my family, I made it my mission to get better — and the best way to express my emotions is through music. Through music I feel like a “normal” person and feel it is my best therapy.

My experience with depression and fighting it inspired me to raise awareness through music. Listening to other bands and artists also helps me, especially when the lyrics are meaningful! My favorite artists and inspiration range from Metallica, Phil Collins and even classical music. The experience of attempting suicide inspired me to not only help myself, but to help others who feel the same as me.

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