I was diagnosed with a mental illness at the age of 19. I am now 62. Not only have I suffered from mental illness I have struggled with the stigma of having mental illness for 43 years now.  I was diagnosed with acute depression, PTSD and bi-polar disorder and I became very much overwhelmed - alone, lost and hopeless. I was seriously contemplating suicide. Someone suggested that I investigate the services available at my local chapter of NAMI. 

I understand that I can never be completely cured of mental illness but with the help of the advocates at NAMI my ‘situation’ was stabilized and there is now hope in my life. In addition to the regular psychiatric care I I receive I attend weekly sessions with a ‘Life Coach’ from NAMI as a client of a program they administer called 'Self-Directed Care’. In addition to the one-on-one counseling I am offered specific goal-oriented financial assistance that helps me pay for my treatment and psychiatric medications and in developing and implementing a plan of action who’s goal is to make me self-sufficient and no longer dependent on the welfare system. 

Whether I eventually succeed or not is still in question and a lot depends on me, but the fact is that today I have a real chance to make a contribution to society instead of being a drain on it. Without NAMI I would be just another mental patient wandering without direction and chances are that I would continue to be in and out of inpatient psychiatric facilities - the perpetual 'revolving door’. Thanks to you and your support of NAMI and the great people there I now have a chance to live a healthier, happier, more productive life.  More of a blessing than a burden.  Thank you.  

I have a family history involving mental illness. I have had one sister commit suicide, another who has tried and/or threatened it for many years. Myself, I was originally diagnosed with depression since my teenage years. For many years my medication was a god send. I am 60 yrs old (October 4). A large corporation in Madison (and beyond) allowed my direct manager to harass and bully myself and residents on a continuing basis. The end result, I am now on SSDI, unable to work, drive, and unable to support myself  (years of lost wages ahead). This person broke me down, now diagnosed as PTSD, severe depression, anxiety and now I have panic attacks. Harassment is a hard thing to prove in a court of law, as is bullying. It seems no-one will open this can of worms. This must be stopped. The man got fired, finally, after continued mistreatment of 200 elderly people in the building, (after I had to leave my profession because of his abuse). I only wish I would have known about recognizing this type of behavior immediately, and finding out where to get help so that it never happens to someone else.

I want to send the message that BULLYING, and harassment is NEVER ACCEPTABLE. SPEAK UP!!!

Hi my name is Linda and I am a 51 year old who has been struggling with depression for most of my life.  I would like to share my story of my struggle with mental illness and suicide.  I have become BOLD with regards to sharing my battle with depression and suicide in hopes that I may reach at least one person and help them with their struggle or help someone to understand what it is like to have this disease.

In high school, the depression presented itself in a big way and I really began to struggle with self-worth and hopelessness.  Then suicidal thoughts started coming to the forefront.  Back in the 80’s depression and suicide were things that most people didn’t talk about and would keep behind closed doors.  I really didn’t understand what was going on.  All I knew was that I didn’t like myself and I felt that I was no good to anyone.  At that point, all I could think about was ridding myself of the hurt and pain I was feeling. 

Keep reading

My life has been affected in several different ways by mental illness. I have been diagnosed with mental illness—I suffer from depression and have been told that I am bipolar. I choose to manage my diagnosis without medication. My 27 year old daughter suffers from a variety of mental illness diagnosis, but the biggest way my life has been affected is by my son being diagnosed with multiple mental health diagnosis at the early age of 4. I noticed that he was different from most children early on (around 8 months) because he hardly ever slept. I was exhausted as a young mother of 2 babies. His sister was 18 months old when he was born. When he was almost a year old, he was diagnosed with spinal meningitis. He had a very scary seizure because of a high fever and was hospitalized. This was the true beginning. From that point on, we were in and out of doctors and hospitals and I really didnt know what I was supposed to do about his behavior. At the age of 4 he set my house on fire at 3 am in the morning, when everyone else was asleep. At this time, his neurologist had him institutionalized. After several short stays in mental hospitals for children, he was admitted and I was told he would probably be there for about 6 months and he ended up staying in that facility until he was about 12 and I finally was able to have him moved. He was hospitalized and then kept in group homes until he was 18 years old when he finally signed himself out. After he signed himself out, he began to stay in trouble with law enforcement. He had the following diagnoses: Impulse control disorder, ADHD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, IQ of 59- that of a 7 year old, schizophrenia, bipolar, OCD, seizure disorder. After several encounters with the law, DJ ended up in an altercation with his godmother and stabbed her in the shoulder blade and the neck. He did not kill her, but when he saw the blood, he immediately called 911 and waited on the side of the road for the officers to get there and was transported to jail and charged with aggravated assault. After a year in the county jail, he plead guilty to these charges and was sentenced to 10 years due 5 and was sent to prison.  DJ was in prison from 2014 until October 2017 when he died in prison. DJ had turned 25 years old one week before his death. DJ was such a free spirit, with no boundaries and a handful to deal with. He had the goofiest smile ever and really worked my nerves any chance he could, but he was my DJ and I loved him no matter what. I spent most of his life with him at these hospitals, having family therapies and celebrating holidays. DJ’s mental illnesses were not handled appropriately and because of this, my son is no longer here on Earth with me. I miss him tremendously and have been suffering from depression a lot more lately. I tried to kill myself in May by taking 160 pills, but obviously God was not ready for me yet. My oldest daughter has been hospitalized in 4 mental hospitals since last year. My youngest 2 children arent speaking to me because they think I was a terrible mother because I let DJ die in prison. This has absolutely torn my family apart. I have joined NAMI because I want to be a voice for my son, for myself and for my family. I want to open Safe Haven homes in his memory and I need help doing this. 

Hello my name isTina and I suffer from PTSD, anxiety, suicidal behavior, depression, and now I’m a recovering drug addict. I’ve put my family through Hell the past 3 ½ years. I lost my father 3 ½ years ago from suicide. I’ve always had problems with some kind of mental illness that I’ve never understood. I’ve always been suicidal but I never thought it may have come from my genes (my father).
After losing my father I got worse. I hated myself I could not get along with nobody. I was depressed I wanted to die just so I could find my dad. I have so much guilt in me from him for doing this to me. I was angry with him before he had done it. I said awful mean things to him because I was so angry.
He had just went thru a divorce and was lonely and my mom sister reached out to him for help with her house. I was living with him at the time. He came to me and told me she had sent him a message on Facebook asking if he’d finish her house that she’d had built a few years back. I was in shock when he confronted me. I really didn’t know what to say cause my dad was sick and I knew it so I tried to be easy on him about things, but this was a woman that was like a sister to me and we both new each other’s deepest darkest secrets..she was like my twisted messed up sister, and my dad use to tell me I was just like her.
I knew this would end bad but not this bad! I went crazy he fell in love with her and told me she loved him, I lost it! I then moved out!! I could not bare to live with that situation especially knowing they had affair when I was very young.
He tried reaching out to me so many times but I couldn’t bare to see him and give him my condolences, it wasn’t happening. It caused war between my dads side of the family and my mothers. Everything went bad in just a few months.

Keep reading

At times in my life, when depression had flattened out my world, I have had suicidal ideations, with my first attempt when I was only 9 years old. But this narrative is not about me, it is about my own now 9-year-old son. School had only been in session for a few weeks when I came home from work hurriedly, briefly missing my son’s school bus that was dropping him off.  He was in 4^th grade and had been struggling with bullies since K5.  This year was ramping up to be a challenge already with an increased academic workload and social struggles. Added to that was the fact that he experienced the death of his little brother four years earlier, around this time of year.

Keep reading

My name is Jennifer. I am bipolar. I am not ashamed to admit that I have a mental illness. It is a disease, just like any other disease, it’s nothing to feel ashamed of. I have manic episodes, high anxiety, depression, chronic pain, mood swings, etc. I am currently on Social Security Disability for mental illness. I’m 41 years old & Ive lost every job I have ever had because of my illness. I was never fired for missing work or not doing a good job. I was always fired for issues pertaining to getting along with co-workers or customers. My mood swings, depression & anxiety took over my life. It ruined my marriage. Until I was diagnosed & medicated properly, I was suicidal. 

Keep reading

            My name is Jennifer and I am a recovered mental illness survivor—

            I have endured severe mental illness for over half my life.  During that time, I suffered from clinical depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and borderline personality disorder.

            Due to the depression, my behaviors ranged from excessive crying to excessive sleeping to suicide attempts.  I felt feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness.  All I thought I wanted to do was die.   But in fact, what I really wanted was help with overcoming my severe sadness.

            During my manic states, I endured impulsive, spontaneous, and irresponsible behaviors.  I felt on top of world.  I felt excessive amounts of energy.  I had racing thoughts.  I had delusions of grandeur.  I’ll be honest.  It felt great to be so high, but it is also very dangerous.  Risky behaviors can lead to much endangerment of self and others.

Keep reading

Last year the definition of depression to me was “someone who is sad and needs to get over it.” This year my definition of depression has completely changed. On May 2015 I started experiencing panic attacks. They began in the night. One per night. As the days went by these panic attacks started getting stronger and it wasn’t one per night it was more and suddenly it started taking over my life. I couldn’t sleep, eat or even take a shower.

One day I had panic attacks for almost the entire day.. I ended up going to the ER and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression (I believe I also had panic disorder). I was prescribed medication and it really helped me. I also started going to therapy. When I went to my doctor to get a refill he prescribed me with another medication that instead of helping me, actually made me feel worse and created more problems than the ones I already had so I decided to stop the medication and just continue with the therapy. After a month I started to feel better. I was still feeling nervous the entire day, my head was full of all these thoughts that were senseless and silly.

Keep reading