NAMI - You are Not Alone — My Story

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

My Story

Hi, my name is Addie, I am 16 and have Bipolar. I have struggled with my mental health since I was in kindergarten. I was never aware of my diagnosis or that even had a diagnosis until I went to a therapeutic boarding school and was told by my psychiatrist there. I go through a very bad bipolar swing from December to April. I went through a very bad swing this past year (2016-2017). I was depressed, self harming, and suicidal for the first 4 months. I Never felt happy, not once. Then my psychiatrist put me on a traditional antidepressant. I experienced mania. I was hyper religious and for once felt like God saved me right then and there. Then I was taken off of it and realized what had happened. I felt alone and abandoned by God.

My whole life and faith changed from that time on. I had trouble trusting God and myself. I had to spend months self reflecting and thinking. I had to remember all that God had done in my life big or small. And for once I saw that God was there and had always been there. I had to figure out everything about my disorder all by myself. I sincerely believe that the Lord helped me gain that knowledge. No one ever gave me a book, talked to me about or anything. Basically I asked the Lord, or sometimes he saw the need, and I slowly discovered it. I made small connections that eventually led to me catching my swing before anyone did, even my therapist who sees me every day.

Doing that was helpful and detrimental. I gained great strength but in gaining that strength felt so alone. It has changed me. No one listened to me when i would tell them something was wrong, which lead to fending for myself and having to stand up for myself. It taught me happiness and health is worth fighting for. I learned that God is all I need. Even though I might be going through hell and never feel him, somehow I know he’s there. In the lowest of moments he meets me right when I need him most. I was about to jump off a bridge and drown myself, when I heard the lord say, Addie come back to me. And my body just turned around and ran right back to my house. I never needed God more than in that moment.

I wouldn’t be here today to tell you this if it was not for the Lord. I know it is hard to live with mental illness. I am still fighting that battle today, but I am living proof to tell you, you are not alone, the Lord loves you, and it will always get better even when things keep getting worse. Fight for your happiness and health you deserve it even when others might say otherwise. And never be afraid to say you have bipolar. It is not a bad word. It is your life, your battle, YOUR STORY! Fight with the strength that God gives us. We are stronger because we fight every minute of everyday and we fall and we get back up. Your life is worth living never forget that. You are worth more than anything death has to offer. 

mental illness mental health inspiration hope coping treatment medication therapy recovery bipolar disorder depression suicide self-harm Support Faith submission

See more posts like this on Tumblr

#mental illness #mental health #inspiration #hope #treatment #therapy #bipolar disorder #depression #self-harm #submission #coping #medication #recovery #suicide #Support