Mental health is a big deal here in Wichita Falls, TX. We have a state mental hospital and a host of various private practices, yet stigma is almost immediate. Being a functional person with mental illness causes so many to be skeptical of this disability because it can’t be seen. Everyone who suffers with disability be it that which is physically disabling , mentally disabling or both knows all to well the stigma. If we try and stand up for ourselves we are stigmatized even further as “bitter”, “angry”, “lazy”, “ungrateful”, and “entitled” because those who label us these things “pay taxes” so we can survive. We want to do more than merely survive. We want to thrive. We want to succeed. Greg Abbott is governor and he is disabled physically. Many innovators in many different fields and industries who pioneered if not fathered what we now benefit from and enjoy now in this post-modern era, often overcame the setbacks mental illness presented them. They moved with it instead of allowing all that mental illness has with it hold the back. They refused to first- stigmatize themselves. They rejected the stigmas others placed upon them. It was not uncommon that a parent or other influential person in their lives saw in them what others saw as ever incapable and always less than.

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Mental Health Awareness…. end the stigma…This is for my mother. .Jean…this is our story… My mother suffered her whole life with mental illness…I watched her ups and downs from as far back as i can remember..she was brilliant and artsy creative productive and efficient took care of everything perfectly.. we moved 10 times in 13 years because my dad wanted to keep her happy and she would decorate and remodel the houses painting wall papering and taking care of me and my sisters…. and then she would start to change and become crazed over whelmed and aggitated unable to finish all of the projects or keep up and get angry easily and scream and yell and break things and come after me verbally or with a belt and be out of control then she would slow down and crumble and crash into a deep tearful depression unable to get out of bed and take care of us kids and our home and basic necessities many times leading to hospitalization on the psyciatric ward…I remember visiting her many times in different wards ..i didn’t understand it when I was young why my mommy was like this…why she loved me and hated me…was angry and sad….

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It’s mental illness awareness month, and in order to spread awareness I’ve decided to share my own experiences with my mental health journey. This is the first few days of thoughts I’ve had and written, please feel free to share in advance, and help encourage me that I’m making a positive step to continue to break the stigma with mental illnesses. This is a long post….

as I’ve grown older I’ve come to realize that the end of September to the first couple of weeks in October everything always seems to challenge me, it’s a pattern, one I realized by looking through my Facebook memories. The first week of October is always mentally exhausting and brings back flashbacks that even 11 years later have their affect on me, this year it has affected me tremendously because of The huge amount of change that has happened this year, and I can say it has by far been the hardest change I’ve ever had to go through. Stability is one of the keys to my mental health.

See I’ve been in nursing school for 3 years, my final semester in February we found out my mom had breast cancer, she had a lumpectomy and then had to have a mastectomy, she has made it through 3 of 4 rounds of chemo, I graduated RN school after the hardest semester of my life teetering on the edge of pass or fail. Will no second chance to start over, It was the most stressful semester of test of my life. Test are a huge trigger for me and this was the test that would determine if I would achieve my dream of being a nurse. I’m so glad I passed but I wasn’t prepared for what that would open up.

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I was fired from my job. I feel that I was wrongfully fired. I told them that I was not well. I worked at a mental health agency and was hired as a peer support specialist.  So they knew about my mental illness.  I have been working there for 2yrs. They never had a problem with me. This new supervisor that I last had as a trigger to me. To make a long story short. The last time she snapped at me, I snapped back. I told her that she need to learn how to talk to people .  I ended up having a panic attack. I didn’t curse, I didn’t touch her, nor threw anything.  I had all of my doctors excuses so they couldn’t use that to get rid of me. However,  they said the way I acted they had to let me go.  That happened this February,  and my life hasn’t been the same.  My mental health has been at a low since.  No matter how I try to move on i just can’t.  There are so many things that that supervisor did that upsetted me. This woman called my therapist and my phyctrist. Like was lying. I have been thinking that I should of reported to the Director of the agency.  She was always nice to me and did tell me that I could talk to her. But I never did. 😒😒😒😢😢😢

There has always been a stigma around mental health; I see news reports that if the person who committed a crime had a mental illness, they automatically blame the person’s mental illness for what happened. This NOT always the case and most likely wouldn’t be if we had proper mental health care for everyone that needed it.

I was diagnosed with bipolar and depression seven years ago, and see my psychiatrist and counselor regularly. I hold a full-time job, internship, and am pursuing my master’s in communication and digital media. In no way does having bipolar and depression slow me down in life to the point that I can’t achieve my goals. Featuring people that have mental illness and are doing well in life seem to never be shown in ads or on television. I would love to change this because I am someone who takes medication regularly, and successfully lives a normal life!

I just want to put it out there that if you have a mental illness, you too can live a fulfilling life, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!

According to the National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI), “Everyone knows a little about mental health issues but knowing the facts about mental illness can help you educate others and reject stigmatizing stereotypes. They are not the result of personal weakness, lack of character or poor upbringing. Understanding mental health isn’t only about being able to identify symptoms and having a name for these conditions but dispelling many false ideas about mental health conditions as well.”

Although 1 in 5 Americans live with a mental health condition, my ex-husband treats me like I’m a psychopath all because I was diagnosed with a very manageable disorder.  We have a son between us and after being evaluated by a psychologist that he chose, specific recommendations were made that made me feel like a criminal.  The recommendations laid out included that I provide random drug and alcohol hair tests to my ex-husband, have a breathalyzer installed in my car, and attend AA for one year. 

Let me first state that I’ve never received a DWI or drank alcohol while my son or daughter were in the car with me.  The psychologist during several of our interviews had asked me about drinking alcohol and I explained that I did consider myself a heavy drinker during my divorce and for a short time after.  I NEVER admitted to being an alcoholic,  I was very upfront and honest with the psychologist on all his questions so I had no reason to lie about this. 

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May is Mental Illness Awareness Month.  Each year it brings up memories that I have tried to forget for over 40 years.  This year I am tearing down the walls I’ve built around my mental illness memories and cycles of suffering.  This year I am being vulnerable and engaging in a conversation about the shame and stigma around mental illness by sharing my personal story with you. 

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Just saw the play “Twisted Melodies” (singer/musician Donny Hathaway Mental Heath Struggles) in New York today. Wow, what a beautiful way to share, educated and bring to life the importance of understanding and lifting the stigma of mental illness, specifically schizophrenia. Please Support this production so that it can reach every state in this country. Thank you!

Statistics state that 1 in 5 people struggle with mental illness but I’m wondering how many people with mental illness but don’t feel safe and comfortable sharing. The term mental illness carries a stigma that most are ashamed or afraid to carry. I have generalized anxiety disorder along with panick attack disorder but that does not mean that I am my “mental illness” just as someone with high blood pressure isn’t labeled as such. Everyone has struggles and issues and should be able to express themselves and seek out the positive in life! I am optimistic about life and know that the options are endless.. the more I share and open up the lighter I feel. I am not alone. You are not alone. I will continue to be open and transparent and Use my anxiety to fuel the fire and view my shortcomings as a strengths that Are continually shaping who I am and giving me goals for who I want to be.

I am 32, a United States Marine Corps veteran, an auditor and I am living with bipolar disorder II, which causes symptoms of anxiety and depression episodes.

I never truly understood what it meant to have a mental illness until I realized that I was constantly worrying and feeling down. My depression episodes manifested as days of extreme lows where I struggled to get out of bed and perform day-to-day tasks and activities. I spoke to some friends who were dealing with similar symptoms, and they encouraged me to seek professional help. My bipolar diagnosis was identified when I was in a serious car accident while experiencing a manic episode.

Discovering a mental illness while recovering from a major accident was not easy. Here is what helped me accept my diagnosis and recover from my physical and mental injuries:

• My family and friends stepped up tremendously ready to assist and encourage me. I was an emotional and mental mess, and they helped put me back together.
• I had to position myself to receive advice from my family and friends who are familiar with mental illness and are actively managing their own mental illnesses. I also had to remain open to receiving information regarding coping strategies, being mindful of my mood and warning signs of a potential manic episode or manic depression.
• Setting small goals helped me find my way back to myself. I am not the same person I was before the accident, and trying to get back to that person is not realistic. I had to accept the now me in order to move forward.   

Today, I am different because I am living with my diagnosis and my diagnosis is not controlling me. I see my therapist and psychologist on a regular basis. I am mindful of my mood on a daily basis and aware of the warning signs of manic and depressive episodes. I ultimately have taken charge of my life and my health.

There is a need for mental illness to be recognized as a real and serious condition in community specifically the African American community. People need to be educated on the various mental illness diagnoses and symptoms and see a therapist at least 2-4 times a year to maintain their mental health. Education and therapy ensure they are not putting themselves or others in danger. Many people are unaware of their mental illness and choose to suffer in silence. We need to end this process of thinking and encourage people to seek support.

Mental illness screenings should be done 2-4 times a year for preventative reasons, just like an annual physical examinations and biannual dental cleanings. Mental illness screenings should be no different.

My hope is that people who live with mental illness and the people who love them will eventually see all health as equally important.