My Son

My son has had major depression since the 4th grade, he is 19 now and he is worse now than ever. He had a stroke when he was born due to birth trauma and he has right sided deficits with a limp and seizures. He has no real friends, everyone uses him for something and then they leave him. He has been in and out of treatment for years but nothing helps. He has cut himself over the years and he doesn’t sleep well. He doesn’t take care of himself (he doesn’t eat half the time , he doesn’t take his medication like he should, he doesn’t shower for days or brush his teeth. He just doesn’t care. I have enabled him because I have been one of those moms that do everything for their loved one. Since he had the stroke I have always been overly protective and just doted in him. Finally while he was in high school I realized that instead of making him stronger I had made him weak and depend on me for everything from fixing meals to to helping out around the house. He did absolutely nothing. I attempted to start making him wash his own clothes and clean his room, but he never wanted to do anything and to this day he still will not help around the house. His room is filthy and he will only wash clothes when he has nothing else to wear. I need help helping him. He says he will do something but then does nothing. He would not eat or take his medication if I do not make him.