I first began to experience symptoms of bipolar disorder in my early teens. i was put on Lithium while in a hospital and right away the almost catatonic depression I was in began to ease. From there on in, it seemed medication would be the answer to everything that was wrong with me. For years i was on every depression medication available, tricyclics, MAO inhibitors–when one stopped working, I was simply put on something else. Then things got better and I needed no medication through my twenties. i still struggled with lows, but there were no suicide attempts, I was able to live and love, to work and, for the most part, even enjoy life. Then, at the age of 29 I had a manic episode and my medication nightmare began.

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            My name is Jennifer and I am a recovered mental illness survivor—

            I have endured severe mental illness for over half my life.  During that time, I suffered from clinical depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and borderline personality disorder.

            Due to the depression, my behaviors ranged from excessive crying to excessive sleeping to suicide attempts.  I felt feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness.  All I thought I wanted to do was die.   But in fact, what I really wanted was help with overcoming my severe sadness.

            During my manic states, I endured impulsive, spontaneous, and irresponsible behaviors.  I felt on top of world.  I felt excessive amounts of energy.  I had racing thoughts.  I had delusions of grandeur.  I’ll be honest.  It felt great to be so high, but it is also very dangerous.  Risky behaviors can lead to much endangerment of self and others.

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When I was 19 I was finally diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder after 2 years of rapid cycling between mania and depression. I had also dealt with depression for a long time, and have attempted suicide 3 times in my life. It has taken a long time to become stable, but after years of therapy and medications, I’m functioning well and have minimal impairment. I never gave up on my dreams, and now I’m 25, own a home, am halfway through nursing school with a 4.0 GPA at the top of my class, and was selected for a major scholarship to pay for the rest of school. My point is to never give up. I promised myself that when I finally put that R.N. behind my name, I will make a difference and help people who are struggling like I did. I will remind healthcare providers that those lost souls need guiding, and not judgement or whispers. Stay strong, you have a purpose. 

I have been struggling with mental illness from a young age. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, adhd, ocd, borderline personality disorder, anxiety, psychogenic seizures, and a learning disability. I also am I recovering addict. I would like to spread my story to those in need to show them that the darkness does fade as long as you have the strength to flip the light. The goal is to inspire everyone but if that is not possible I aim to touch at least one person.

Hi my name is Robbi I’m a 43year-old mother of 3 at 32 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Mental illness runs in my family.   My mother and grandfather were not diagnosed So unfortunately due to lack of awareness of the disease resources and lack of proper medications at 8 I lost my mother and witnessed  her suicide . At 10 I  witnessed  the  death of my grandfather to suicide also I’m a twin. Despite my extreme trauma and my losses I continue to fight for those like me who need support resources hope love kindness caring respect…most of all stop the stigma. I do not drink nor do drugs. I have no criminal  record. I have an Associate degree as an Licenced Optician. I want to do what ever I can to help who ever I can. God has seen me thru and I feel like this organization will help me achieve those goals as well as I feel thats my purpose. It brings me great joy to give others hope. I want to become a motivational speaker like Les Brown.  With Gods help I will❤

The idea of having a Bipolar Disorder stung me for a long time. When I’m feeling down, sometimes I feel the pressures of the stigma revolving around my mental illness. I always felt like there was a “normal” Valerie or a status quo that I had to

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It was June 2003 when I was first diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder which, no doubt, had gone undiagnosed for my entire life. My life was sprinkled with extreme anxiety attacks, OCD, manic episodes, and especially severe depression. By the time I had my own family – a wife and two boys of my own – my depression had gotten out of control.

For me depression was and is extended periods of time inside a six foot cube with no stimulus. No light sneaking in through my lids. No sound other than shallow, rushed breaths. No breeze touching my face. Alone.

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My first encounter with mental illness was around age eight or nine when I found out that my dad had bipolar disorder (formerly known as manic depression). He and my mom had just gotten remarried, and he had a manic episode, which landed him in the hospital. I learned that bipolar disorder could be treated with medication, but that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain for which there is no cure. 

Bipolar disorder is a hereditary illness. I didn’t think that I had depression, but that I had just  been in depressing situations. When my parents divorced, my grades suffered. I lacked confidence. I was teased and tormented by kids in school. When I became an adult, I couldn’t hold a job, and I found myself in trouble with the law. I tried on several occasions to go to college, but I would get discouraged and quit.

In my 20s, I lived with a friend, her parents and her four siblings for about three years. She and her older brother were physically and verbally abusive towards me. I was able to get out of that situation, but I struggled with the effects of it for a long time. I became friends with a woman whom I’d met in church. We were the same age and shared similar interest, but then my “former” friend resurfaced and manipulated her way into the relationship that was blossoming between my new friend and I.

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“Successfully” Living with Bipolar Disorder, If I Can Do it, So Can You!

 I never thought I’d actually say I was “Successfully Living” with Bipolar Disorder. I’ve been on so many medications and been through cognitive behavior therapy, multiple psychiatric hospitalizations along with a long-term hospitalization as well. When I found out I had medication resistant depression and I had to have ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy) I didn’t think I’d ever become successful.

But, here I am. And, I can actually say for the first time since my diagnosis in 2003 that I am successfully living with Bipolar Disorder. Why do I say “successfully”? Because, I’d rather not consider the other options.

I work hard every day to make sure I stay stable. And, if an episode attempts to rear its ugly head, I’m on top of it. I’ve created a Coping Box that is my “go to” no matter if a mania episode or depressive episode starts. The box is filled with affirmations, prayer journals, my Bible, my Wellness Recovery Action Plan, coloring books, crayons, colored pencils, bubbles, (no one can be in a sad mood with bubbles, right?)  Gummie snacks, a list of people to call, and all sorts of spiritual books to keep me in God’s Word.

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