I was diagnosed 7 years ago with bipolar disorder. I grew up in what most would say a normal family; only most didn’t know my mom had bipolar disorder and was not on meds most of our childhood. Watching her in and out of the hospital and not able to be the mother I needed and wanted made be realize that if I ever was diagnosed I would take control of it because I didn’t want my kids to see me like my mom. You can break the cycle and teach your children that mental illness is ok with the gift of medicine. For a year I did lots of learning about myself and my triggers and how to recognize when I’m not doing well before anything happened. I’m very in tune with my body and mental health. I’m able to tell when my Med levels are low and I call immediately my dr. I was only hospitalized at the beginning and haven’t been since because I’m a firm believer this is no different then high bp or diabetes. I surround myself with people who can also help me notice when I’m not doing great and I listen to them. Also I believe God will use anything that is meant to tear us apart and down to glorify Him and show others when we trust and hand over everything to Him we will preserver and be stronger. My children have watched me take control of my illness and be okay talking about it. I am not ashamed I’m proud that I can show them you can live a happy fulfilled life with a mental illness and can accomplish any goals I set. Change starts with one person standing up and taking control and showing others to not be afraid. I pray this helps someone.

 Chris was a boyfriend of mine who died by suicide many years ago. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder but he didn’t seek help. Suicide is much worse than coping.  Surviving isn’t all there is to do, there are many avenues of support. Never forget family and friends, don’t give up because someone else did! You can not change what has happened to you but you can change how you view yourself. Figure out what you enjoy and don’t lose focus on that. If you lost joy, reach out! The worst thing you can do is lose hope.

 Personally, I have struggled from the very things he was trying to escape. The strangest part was when I discovered that, but it was also the most powerful and vital aspect to my own recovery. Just because you have or don’t have isn’t reason to give up! If you’re feeling down and out you MUST find a way to deal with it. There isn’t any purpose in giving up but there is a reason to find purpose. The resources for help aren’t always what we want to pursue. If you struggle, you’ll do best to explore every avenue available. It’s better to try now than regret later. 

Hi my name is Robbi I’m a 43year-old mother of 3 at 32 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Mental illness runs in my family.   My mother and grandfather were not diagnosed So unfortunately due to lack of awareness of the disease resources and lack of proper medications at 8 I lost my mother and witnessed  her suicide . At 10 I  witnessed  the  death of my grandfather to suicide also I’m a twin. Despite my extreme trauma and my losses I continue to fight for those like me who need support resources hope love kindness caring respect…most of all stop the stigma. I do not drink nor do drugs. I have no criminal  record. I have an Associate degree as an Licenced Optician. I want to do what ever I can to help who ever I can. God has seen me thru and I feel like this organization will help me achieve those goals as well as I feel thats my purpose. It brings me great joy to give others hope. I want to become a motivational speaker like Les Brown.  With Gods help I will❤

The idea of having a Bipolar Disorder stung me for a long time. When I’m feeling down, sometimes I feel the pressures of the stigma revolving around my mental illness. I always felt like there was a “normal” Valerie or a status quo that I had to

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My Story (super short version!):

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in my early teens. Spent the rest of my life up until four years ago being ashamed of who I was.

But I am not my illness, my illness is not me. I don’t need nor do I want sympathy. What I need and want is help to stop the stigma of mental illness.

I’m also selfless to a fault, which is very debilitating (to say the least!).. but it is also, ironically enough, part of why I’m still alive and in the place I am today.

With that being said, I don’t ask for help a lot. I’m getting better at that though & making sure I’m asking when I truly need it - like today. I’m asking for your help.

Please help me stop the stigma once and for all. 🙏🏻❤️

 #KNOWBETTER #DOBETTER #BEBETTER #MENTALWELLNESS

This isn’t just an expression anymore, it is no longer a joke. Mental illness is something affecting every single person on many different scales, in my short journey in this life; including me. 

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Just today, I felt like I was an “advocate”. It was a small thing… an instant that others in the room might have missed, or thought was completely awkward, but it was me taking a brief second in time to try to defy “the stigma”. Today one of my coworkers asked me how I stay on top of it all. I genuinely answered by saying, “When I am on, I’m on. When I am off, I am off. I have Bipolar Disorder.” Immediately it was strange. Sadly enough, I responded to the silence with, “Don’t worry. I’m medicated. I’m not gonna flip out on you or anything.” Then I realized I had just perpetuated what I was trying to defy. 

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 23. About time. I remember feeling like I couldn’t, and did not, relate with people when I was a young adolescent. Even before that, really. I’ve been confused about how I feel all of my life. Even now, I am unsure that I can trust myself. Should I feel this way? Do others feel like this? Is the way I am behaving uncomfortable to those around me? It sucks. 

I am now 39. I have been hospitalized multiple times, grabbed the wheel of a car someone else was driving and ran it into a guardrail on the freeway, self medicated myself with alcohol and a multitude of other things, hurt people I loved with all my “shenanigans”, had an affair on my ex-husband with a guy I knew was not good for me, threatened to slit my wrist just to prove a point, spent money I didn’t have on things that I thought would make me feel better, stayed away from my beautiful children because I thought they deserved better (if I am honest with myself about that, I did it because I wanted to), made plans to bail on everything I love by running away or by “offing” myself, said hurtful things to the people I love, rode a horse down Jordan Parkway (there was no horse), started fights… physical ones. I could go on and on.

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I was told NOT to disclose to my boss that I had depression/bipolar disorder and that this would set me back at work. Mental illnesses have always had stigmas surrounding them. WHY? Why is having a mental disability any different than having a physical disability or illness? Why should I be able to call in sick to work for having a head cold, but not for having a debilitating panic attack? Why is it that when it comes to matters of the mind, we are expected to simply ‘suck it up’? You wouldn’t expect me to suck it up if I had a 104 degree fever, would you?

This needs to change. We need to change it. We need to spread the message that it’s OKAY to be depressed, and its okay to get help for it. We can start by being more accepting of each other, and being more open about our own struggles.

I’ve been so frustrated as a person with Bipolar Disorder, and not only the stigma, but the lack of empathy within the work industry. My husband works in the software entertainment industry, where everything is either on a time limit, or they are working 10+ hours of overtime for months, until their product ships. The overtime for me is the complete worst, it’s literal torture for me. His work doesn’t offer health insurance, individual health insurance is much to expensive for us, and I don’t qualify for Medicaid. Many times over the past few months I’ve been home alone, shaking, sobbing, terrified of the almost unbearable urges to end it all. The separation anxiety has been torture. It’s affected his work performance drastically, and he’s a lead who’s expected to maintain morale & lead by example.

Over the years, we have found “mental illness of a spouse” to be the least accepted reason for taking personal days, or any extended time off (a few days.) Especially when everything has a deadline, or overtime is expected. On the other hand, this industry is most times lenient on tardiness, long lunches. This part has actually been a benefit. It’s so conflicting. Plus, usually when a project is finished, studios will either lay off a majority of their employees, or shit down completely. Every few years leaving us in turmoil about his next job, which state we have to move, losing houses. Last time he was laid off, our older children had to move out of state (with biological dad), and we had to downsize our lives dramatically. He got a stable job that paid barely 1/3 of what he was making before…but the hours were predictable. Our lives financially were much simpler, due to the strict income, and I felt much more stable. I wasn’t worried about him losing his job, or all of the “political” BS that goes on in his industry. I am always fearing his position, usually merely due to creative differences. Things just felt more calm. The kids slowly started coming back, and I felt like we were adjusting to our new lives…myself being relieved.

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There is no shame in having mental illness. I have bipolar disorder and it has not stopped me from pursuing my ambitions and achieving my goals. The stigma can only be overcome if you are honest with yourself about your condition. You don’t need to become an open book but the more open you are; the more people will empathize. There is a difference between empathy and pity; you don’t need anyone’s pity. You are strong because you are still alive and as long as there is breath in you, you will overcome. I have descended to the depths of madness three times in my life. All three times I recovered–these recoveries are a badge of honor and accomplishment. Each time you persevere, you show the world what you are made of. For every time you fall and get back up, you show the world that you are more than your illness. Anything that you achieve, from the small victory of getting out of bed in the morning to the accomplishments of getting your degree, starting a new job, or taking a chance on a new relationship—the fact that you persevered is testament to your iron will. Know that when people turn their backs on you because of fear, it is more a reflection of them than of yourself. Your friends love you. Your family loves you. God loves you. You will persevere and you will show the world that you are made from a tougher grade of material—a material that shines bright. Don’t hide your brightness :)