An Apparition Of Shakespeare’s"

I was a ghost writer for Shakespeare.
Corrected every line that was ever written.

I was immortalized in a fortune cookie’s quotation.
A real Dybbuk.

Colors shot out of my head..

Neither twixt nor twain.

The professors dissected Albert’s brain.

To see a sane rain in the flame.
I read it in a book about money.

Plagiarizing the Doctor’s quotes in my notes.
Everything remains without any names.

The words he quoted to the world without any pains.
The voice is still the same.

Nothing it will ever soothe or tame.
For it his eyes were maimed.

Now he can’t see the different colored flame shot out of his brain.
In Covington Lane.

Where he threw his computer down the drain.
Thinking Luddites were sane!

Fried his scrambled brain.

The story ends the same.
In a midnight painted gory.

Jon Billet’s writing of the morning glory.
Plagiarism of the story.

“Children Play”

Children play for the new day.
Rhymes will ring in their own way.

In your old age there is youth.
So it was written in a page of a-
book, by a sage.

Writing the wise man’s quotes-
on hundred dollar notes-

Money don’t sink it floats.
As the ocean’s boats.

Underneath the rains-
The totes umbrella which feigns.

A Captain will steer by automated rote.
To where, the passengers don’t know or-
go in a circular square.

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“I think knowing what you cannot do is more important than knowing what you can.” – Lucille Ball

There are a lot of quotes about knowing your limits that posit the notion that those limits are then a new baseline for the inevitable growth that comes with self-awareness. It’s the more appealing option, of course. Thinking you’re only going to get better in the future is the basis of business for self-help books, diet plans, and gyms. There are no seminars on just staying where you are. You can change; you can surpass limits.

Except that’s not what limits means. It means the end. No matter how increasingly nebulous the edge of the universe becomes, there is still an edge. I know my limits. I know what I can and can’t do. And while I think there is always room for self help, it’s also important to know what you should just let go.

I had back surgery in 2012 and at about 4:00 AM, the nurse said I had to empty my bladder before the doctor saw me in a few hours. I said, great, unhook me from these excellent drugs and I’ll pop in the loo. With the carefree nature of someone who got to pee in toilets, the nurse laughed. She handed me the bedpan. I said, “I won’t be able to go in this.”

She’s heard that before. (Probably) no one really enjoys going in a bedpan. She said that everyone says that until the catheter’s brought out (a straight catheter, because I had not planned on staying the night and therefore forgot to bring my own).

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            … we’d grab ours back.” Regina Brett said it best. While I love all inspirational quotes, this one always seems relatable – no matter what is going on in life. It always brings me back to a memory I have from several years ago, a memory that perfectly parallels this positive line.

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I would like to share my story but I don’t know how to write it out. I have post traumatic stress from childhood abuse. I was married to an abusive man for 22 years. I am divorced now and live alone. I talk to a therapist about the past. I got help. I talked about my past only to help others I don’t lived there anymore. Some of my favorite quotes are: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. LOVE YOURSELF. I AM ENOUGH. I don’t have to be anything for anybody.  I live one day at time. I have learned that I can’t stay at home alone because when I do I get so depressed  that I don’t do anything except  eat and sleep. So I have to stay busy. I go to a group 3 days a week, help take care of my mom and children in my family and do volunteer work. I attend  church and go to movies and I love music concerts and plays. I this hope helps.

I first experienced depression in early teens. By my early 20’s I ended up in a psych hospital and by my late 20’s I ended up twice in the hospital because of talks of suicide.

I believe the love and prayers of family and friends helped me in my battle with depression,and general anxiety disorder. Plus moments of psychosis.

Feeding myself with positive quotes were and still are helpful. Learning how to forgive myself and others was also needed. We are all connected and love and understanding is what is needed for all who struggle with mental illness and for all.

Although i love to read positive posts and inspirational quotes…living with BP and having been on the worst journey over the last 4 months…it is so disheartening to hear people just want us to just get over it or feel happy…it doesn’t work that way for us…to know there are so many like us out there gives me hope…i just hate the stigma and being a teacher having to be quiet about it.

And I knew I wasn’t right 

So I planned on going that Friday night 

And I knew I wasn’t okay

Making it the perfect place for me to stay 

See, for most, a mental hospital isn’t a choice 

It’s one of those things where you are left without a voice 

Brought there suddenly against your will

Then before you know it, you are given a bunch of random pills 

But for me, it was where I was supposed to be

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