I first began to experience symptoms of bipolar disorder in my early teens. i was put on Lithium while in a hospital and right away the almost catatonic depression I was in began to ease. From there on in, it seemed medication would be the answer to everything that was wrong with me. For years i was on every depression medication available, tricyclics, MAO inhibitors–when one stopped working, I was simply put on something else. Then things got better and I needed no medication through my twenties. i still struggled with lows, but there were no suicide attempts, I was able to live and love, to work and, for the most part, even enjoy life. Then, at the age of 29 I had a manic episode and my medication nightmare began.

Keep reading

            My name is Jennifer and I am a recovered mental illness survivor—

            I have endured severe mental illness for over half my life.  During that time, I suffered from clinical depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and borderline personality disorder.

            Due to the depression, my behaviors ranged from excessive crying to excessive sleeping to suicide attempts.  I felt feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness.  All I thought I wanted to do was die.   But in fact, what I really wanted was help with overcoming my severe sadness.

            During my manic states, I endured impulsive, spontaneous, and irresponsible behaviors.  I felt on top of world.  I felt excessive amounts of energy.  I had racing thoughts.  I had delusions of grandeur.  I’ll be honest.  It felt great to be so high, but it is also very dangerous.  Risky behaviors can lead to much endangerment of self and others.

Keep reading

Hi I’m Dave and I have struggled with Schizoaffective Disorder (a lovely combination of Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia) for over 40 years.  As a child I suffered with extreme depression and manic episodes.  When I was eleven I began hearing voices.  I am now 52 and it’s been a long, difficult, and strange road. Over the years I have learned a few tricks that have allowed me to experience a degree of peace and serenity, sometimes. Let me tell you a little bit about this disease, the consequences it’s had on my life, and how I’ve learned to cope with it.

From what I understand hallucinations and delusions can be a little different for different people. For me, hearing voices is just like it sounds, it’s like being in a room with people around you talking. It comes and it goes in varying degrees of intensity, and it can drive you mad.

Keep reading

The pain that’s associated with the diagnosis of a loved one with Mental illness, such as Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Anxiety, Suicide, Self Harm, Substance Abuse is and can be very stressful and depleting on the loved ones caring for the individuals with the diagnosis. I have learned from my experiences with my daughter that it takes a lot of Love, Patience and Compassion in order to be their support system which is not at all an easy task, for the simple fact that they perceive you to be against them in spite of you trying your hardest to help and support them. by the way i’ve experienced all these diagnosis with my daughter who was 17 when I began to see these behaviors began to unfold. She’s now 21 and have had many hospitalization and so many issues with staying out of trouble with the law as a result of making poor choices. The treatment options that was offered for her didn’t work because she wouldn’t participate unless she was in the hospital, so after she was released from the hospital the cycle would just repeat itself. There  were times when I didn’t know where to turn for help, I felt desperate so I would search for answers and resources on websites that’s designed for mental health just to find none or ending back to starting point. 

Keep reading

      During the late 1990’s I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder.  Before this I was working full-time and attending college full-time but I was abusing marijuana and alcohol by using it to cope with the stress of doing too much.  My reality would become a distorted one for me because I started hearing voices, seeing images, and I believed I could communicate with people on television.  These were the symptoms i remember experiencing before my first breakdown.

      I was then arrested and felt lost in a world I had never been, on, a psychiatric unit at a local hospital.  This would become a place where I felt lost, disoriented, and unhappy.  By the time I was hospitalized the third time I had become  aware that I had been diagnosed with a mental illness.  I had stopped using alcohol but I started using marijuana again.  

Keep reading

My name is Jonathan and I am 28 years old with a diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. I was born in South Korea to a mother who was labeled “mentally unstable”. I was adopted by my family as a baby and grew up in Virginia and Louisiana. As a child, I was markedly different and as I grew older things got more and more complicated.

            I didn’t start the process of seeing doctors and therapists until I was 15 years old and it took an entire decade for me to be properly diagnosed and placed on the right medications. Over the years I had a variety of diagnosis’ to include: ADHD, Asperger’s, Oppositional-Defiance Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Bipolar disorder, then finally schizoaffective. I had been placed on almost every different anti-depressant and anti-psychotic available and they were all accompanied by mixed ranges of undesirable side effects.

Keep reading

Hello, I have always thought that sharing my story with the mental health community is important to bring hope to others that are just like me.

I’m a 37 year old divorced mother of two boys. I have been in therapy of some kind or another since I was 7 years old. Mental illness runs in my family as well as substance abuse addiction. I believe I was born with my many disorders that progressed and worsened as I got older, abused illegal drugs, prescribed medication and had my children. In my early childhood I showed all the many signs of OCD. I also grew up in an extremely chaotic family where my mother suffered terribly with her own mental illness that was never acknowledged or treated and an emotionally absent father. My two older siblings coped with this by using and abusing drugs and my older sister was put into rehab when I was seven. My older brother simply moved away and is still an addict today covering up his own mental health issues. My younger sister was extremely emotionally disturbed and would act out violently towards my parents but especially towards me. She would later become a drug addict for many years and thankfully entered recovery 4 ½ years ago.

Keep reading

And I knew I wasn’t right 

So I planned on going that Friday night 

And I knew I wasn’t okay

Making it the perfect place for me to stay 

See, for most, a mental hospital isn’t a choice 

It’s one of those things where you are left without a voice 

Brought there suddenly against your will

Then before you know it, you are given a bunch of random pills 

But for me, it was where I was supposed to be

Keep reading